So you are probably wondering what the topic is – or you know and you want to know why I have put this into the “hair” category.  Here’s the deal, I went to a Ludacris concert recently.  Google him if you don’t know who I am talking about.  It was somewhat going to be a fun event and somewhat a work event.  I am not sure how or if I would share the story from either of those angels.  However, I can write about the connection to the event and my hair.  And how I was treated becuase of it.

So here goes…

Hopefully, you have read the “pink highlights” story already.  What I did not clarify in that story was that this particular hair style was done specifically with Ludacris in mind.  The event was supposed to happen on November 10th but was bumped because Ludacris ended up hosting Saturday Night Live that weekend.  I had set up my hair color appointment for the 9th via Nicci’s advice so that we could have a solid hair ‘do’ for the Ludacris event.  At the time, I had been told I would have part in doing a training on HIV to the staff and performers at this event (including Ludacris).  When the date got changed, I decided to go ahead with my scheduled hair appointment.  I didn’t know if or when the event would happen for sure.

I did not know until less than a week before for certain.  It was questionable up until days before whether the training would occur or not.

I learned a few hours before the concert that I was going to stand on stage at midnight, right before Ludacris would perform, in front of a possible crowd of 4,000.  yikes…

We were to meet up with the head of security when we arrived.  He had been alerted to watch for ‘a woman with a beard’ and “just in case there are more than one women with a beard, she is the one with pink highlights in her hair”.  Indeed, the hair helped me stand out enough, amazingly in that crowd, to not be hassled by the security dude.

The hair… it got me some excellent looks and very nice compliments throughout the night.  Thank God too, any amount of ego boost was helpful in getting the nerve to stand up on the stage.  I don’t know if Ludacris saw my hair at all but the rest of the crowd did.  And I know it looked good.  Thank God, I needed to feel pretty that night…

PS I got my hair cut tonight.  The pink highlights are still fabulous and bright.  Nicci said it was OK to use her name now so I won’t have to keep refering to her as the woman who does my hair.  She rocks.

I have to admit, I was missing the pink.  When I was getting dressed this morning and remembering that I had a hair appointment for a new color I thought of the color pink.  I have so many beautiful shirts that go well with pink.  Of course, those of you who know me well know that I don’t verbally request any color, haven’t for years.  I fully trust the woman who does my hair.  I know she has to be thrilled with the opportunity to do whatever she wants to do and allow her brilliant creativity to shine.  I trust her with my hair.  I trust her.

So I had no idea what color I would end up with by the end of the night.

I walked in to the salon and she was at the front desk, greeted me and we walked back to her station.  She knew exactly what she was going to do to my hair.  I could tell.  I don’t remember what all she said verbatim but she let me know how exciting it was going to be.

She put on her gloves.  The colors had already been mixed up before my arrival.  She was prepared.  She got busy with whatever she does.  I normally pay attention as much as possible to the process.  I admit it, I am fascinated with it all and would love to “do” hair.

I noticed some tin foil going on up there and felt the coolness of the dye sinking in.  But I started talking to her and didn’t pay attention much at all to what she was doing.  I like the surprise.

She is a wonderful listener.  She remembers all the players and themes in my life.  She got an ear full today.  At some point, she took me to the sink and rinsed out my hair.  The conversation paused when she had me back in the chair and had to go get something from the other room.  At that point, I looked in the mirror.  My hair had been a rather dark red with some black undertone.  It had faded into a wonderful brownish reddish color.  With whatever highlights she had just added, it reminded me even more of the leaves fallen all over, or holding on still, this season.  It seemed a melting of red, orange, yellow and brown.  It was incredible.

She returned and I made a comment about how wonderful it looked.  “I know right?  You just wait!”

I resumed to talking about my life.  I noticed she had another bowl of color and the brushing on of a brilliant pink began.

The pressure steadily deflated as the appointment went on.  I am not sure what is more helpful in the process.  Certainly, the counselor-like-patience and listening skills are helpful.

I also tend to believe pink has an incredibly healing quality about it.

I admit that I fought my love for pink for many years but I have admitted to myself and come out of the “pink lover’s closet”.  I no longer hide my pink.  I wear it whenever I want to.  And one of my all time favorite hair colors was when she did it solid pink all over.  It was wonderful.

And the general public treated me better – but that is another story.

I walked out of the salon tonight with darker hair.  I haven’t looked at it enough to see if it is more black than brown or vice versa, or both for that matter.  It is different from every angle but the overall essence of the hair cut is a darker shade.  But then, bright pink highlights.  Bright.  Pink.

I love it.  It makes me happy.  More people will smile at me.  And when I am stressed out in the upcoming months, the pink will help me feel my strength.

Think pink…

It may seem crazy, but, my hair deserves its own category.  I sat down to write the Pink Highlight story tonight and couldn’t decide what category to put it into.  Initially, I just knew I wanted to share the story.  Then I remembered I should choose a category if I can.  I thought about putting it into the “health” category.  I do believe that having one’s hair “done” by the right person is very healing on a physical and mental level at the very least.  I have as much, if not more, relief from a hair cut as I get from a massage or acupuncture treatment.

I could also have put it into the “gender” category.  I have spoken or written about countless stories in the last several years about how I am treated by the general public, by anyone who doesn’t know me, depending on my hair.  The length of it has had a great deal of power during different phases of my life.  The cut of course.  I have had a lot of styles.  A lot.  I have also had a lot of colors and the color also changes how people treat me.  Eventually, I will share specific examples that back up my theory that people are nicer to me when I have wild colors in my hair.

I could write about my hair in the “family/friends” category as I value my hair person in my inner circle of support.  I have a friend who referred to herself once as a “hair slut”.  She goes to a different person every time she gets it cut.  I am the opposite of this.  I have to have complete trust and faith in whoever I am going to let touch my hair.  It isn’t about their skills as a hair stylist either (although this is a bonus).  Once I find the right person, I am devoted to them.  I know that this is appreciated.  And once they trust that I mean it when I say that they can do whatever they want… they are free to be creative.  It also goes well when they understand that I won’t “cheat” on them and show up at the salon in someone else’s chair.

I have written one essay titled “Hair” and it is published on the Sexing the Political (STP) website.  I am going to leave that one in the “Wollner’s Writing” category since it was published.

But I will write about my hair in its own category now and, over time, you will understand more clearly as to why it stands alone as a key topic in my life. Stay tuned for pink highlights…